


Been Down

by Xr_ox



Category: Captain America - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Spoilers, Civil War, M/M, Not A Fix-It, Pre-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Sadness, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-17
Updated: 2016-05-17
Packaged: 2018-06-09 00:19:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,341
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6881572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xr_ox/pseuds/Xr_ox
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pepper give him his heart back with a handful of jewelry and a soft kiss on the cheek. </p><p>He then gives it to Steve.</p><p>*fic contains lots of Civil War spoilers*</p>
            </blockquote>





	Been Down

**Author's Note:**

> Beware this is the first I've written anything in years! So this is purely self-indulgent....

 

**Been Down.**

 

 

Pepper give him his heart back with a handful of jewelry and a soft kiss on the cheek.

 

“I'm sorry.” Is all she says as she pulls away, voice thick with emotion and eyes red-rimmed from tears she has yet to shed.

 

It isn't until after she leaves that he is able to look down at the item in his hand. The ruby and shrapnel glimmer in the light and as he stares at it, he knows there is no chance of him and Pepper ever being together again.

 

The sharp twinge of relief in his chest sickens him and he clenches his fist around the sharps until his hand bleeds like his chest did all those years ago.

 

His heart, if he's ever had one to begin with, has finally returned to him again.

 

\--------------

 

He and Steve dance around each other for several months before finally agreeing to a date. Tony's never really wine and dined anyone, not even Pepper, but he pulls out all the stops for one Steve Rogers.

 

Well, he does at first. It quickly becomes apparent that Steve gets uncomfortable when large amounts of money are spent on him, and Tony turns their fancy dress restaurant dates to grabbing hot dogs from local stands and walking leisurely around Central Park.

 

He falls hard and fast for Steve.

 

During their first month anniversary, they spend the day flirting over the com links as they battle Hydra goons. Then Clint falls off a building and they keep their distractions to a minimum until the battle is over.

 

Their second month they spend fighting each other. Voice loud and words sharp until Thor laughs at their squabble and forces them away from each other. Tony spends the night awake, knowing that he's ruined another good thing. Then Steve gives him a small smile and an apology the next morning and Tony thinks they might be alright after all.

 

Their third month anniversary is spent in bed with each other for the first time, the longest Tony has ever been with someone and not had sex on the first date or two. But as they lie next to each other, bodies slick from sweat and cum, he's glad they waited as long as they did.

 

Several days later he calls in a favor from an acquaintance and hopes he's not rushing into anything.

 

He gives Steve a necklace on their fourth month together and bites his lip as he watches Steve curiously inspect the item. He's refashioned the old necklace into something just for Steve. The shrapnel shards are now jagged extensions on the bottom of hollowed out bullet casing with a small blue sapphire embedded into the brass. It fits Steve better, he thinks.

 

Steve thanks him for the gift and with a soft smile places the long cord over his head and lets it rest over his heart. Tony fixates on the site before him before he gives Steve the explanation for the gift.

 

“It was a part of me I wanted to share with you.” He finishes and reaches out to touch the casing on Steve's chest.

 

“Oh, Tony...” He hears softly before he's pulled into a gentle hug. “Thank you,” Steve says sincerely.

 

Tony smiles up at him and finishes the conversation with a kiss. He's glad he was able to once again share his heart with someone else.

 

A month later the Winter Soldier is spotted in Paris and Tony spends his fifth anniversary with Steve alone in his tower.

 

**\--------------**

 

Tony doesn't see Steve until three months later when Secretary Ross comes to the compound to discuss the Accords with the other Avengers.

 

He and Steve don't get the chance to have a good reunion like Tony had hoped. Instead, all talk is taken up by the Accords and the first migraine Tony's had in years. He gives his reasons for supporting the Accords and searches Steves' face. Steve looks like he's considering agreeing before he's distracted by his phone buzzing and then he's off like a dart with a soft, “I have to go.”

 

Tony doesn't take his eyes away from the door Steve left out of until Natasha asks him a question. He looks back at her and is surprised to see she's the only one left in the room. He furrows his brow and looks at her question on his lips.

 

She rolls her eyes and sits across from him. “They left soon after Steve did. Now my question is: Why are you signing if Steve's against it?”

 

He frowns at her. “I told you right before Steve left the room. You know right before you agreed with me.”

 

Her face remains stoic as she stares at him, waiting for his answer.

 

Tony heaves a sigh and feels his migraine pulsing in his head at him. “I can't not sign it. Believe me, I get Steve's point, I do. But out of all of us, I have to sign it.”

 

Natasha thinks for a moment. “Your business. You can't afford not to comply or the government will seize your assets.” She explains for him.

 

“And where would we be without my considerable finances?” He asks with a scoff. “But regardless, I do believe that the right thing to do is sign. I'm sure Steve will see that eventually.”

 

They fall silent and eventually Natasha leaves with a touch to his shoulder.

 

Later when his is buried in paperwork and politics, he learns that Aunt Peggy passed away and he's missed the funeral by eighteen hours.

 

Several hours after that there's an explosion at Vienna signing of the Accords and the Winter Soldier is to blame.

 

\--------------

 

Tony's heart aches when Ross calls Steve a criminal and he fights with every verbal and legal power he has to get Steve and Sam clear of any charges. It takes almost two hours and a promise of consequences before Ross lets him off the phone and Tony takes a look at Steve.

 

“Consequences?” Steve asks, as hardness to his voice he hasn't had around Tony since their first meeting and the Ultron disaster.

 

“Had to tell him something.” He explains quickly and exists with Natasha to talk about getting Bucky Barnes a sufficient psych evaluation.

 

He returns to the central glass room with a peace offering to Steve. He's not sure when the tension between them started but it's palpable in the enclosed room as he hands over the pens to Steve and sits down next to him.

 

“Come on, Steve-” He starts but pauses when he notices something's off about Steve. “Where's...?” He trails off and gestures to his own neckline hoping Steve will get what he's asking.

 

Steve's brow furrows as he reaches to pat at his neck and tenses. “Oh,” He says simply and swallows. “They took it when they confiscated our stuff,” he explains.

 

Tony frowns. “I'll have them give it back.” He promises, then huffs out a breath. “What'd they think you'd do with it? Stab someone?” He shakes his head at the thought.

 

“Don't.... It's fine Tony.” Steve assures. “You didn't come in here just to ask me that did you?”

 

“No, I didn't.” Tony agrees and lets the subject drop. But is silent for a few moments before he picks up where he left off. “Steve we need to be a united front on this issue. They're using our divide against us. But we can still fight this.”

 

“Tony...” Steve signs out and worries his lip as he picks up one of the pens. “You think there's a way we can turn this around in our favor?”

 

“There's nothing that can't be undone if you would sign with us. Your signature counts more than the rest of ours.” Tony says honestly and watches hopefully as Steve gets up. “We can even get Barnes some good therapy that will help him acclimate more if he needs it, and Wanda can go out without fear.”

 

“What about Wanda?” Steve asks with a frown.

 

Tony pauses and watches Steve's face harden as he explains. “Vision's keeping her confined to the compound until further notice.”

 

“Damn it, Tony!” Steve shouts and glares at him. “Just when I think I get somewhere with you, you pull something stupid! She doesn't need to be under Vision's watch, she's not dangerous!”

 

“I'm doing what I can here Steve!” He shouts back, clenching his hands into fists in his lap to stop their shaking. “It doesn't help that I don't only have to get her out of trouble but you're off gallivanting with a wanted criminal and becoming one yourself!”

 

Steve's face turns murderous for a second and Tony feels a shiver run through him as Steve calmly reaches over and returns his pen. “I'd hate to break up the set.” He says before he walks out of the room.

 

Tony sucks in a breath and slides his sunglasses over his eyes with shaking hands.

 

He's no longer sure if he's able to fix this.

 

\--------------

 

Everything goes it shit. He's not sure he can fix this.

 

\--------------

 

When Natasha leaves his side with a threat, he starts to think if it might have been better if he hadn't signed the Accords. He'd thought of every angle that could have possibly happened if he'd signed or if he hadn't.

 

What he hadn't accounted for was his teammates not to have his back. They should have been a united front with either decision but instead, he and Steve had broken their little family apart and now Rhodey....

 

He has FRIDAY call up a helicopter and spends the trip learning more about what Steve had been trying to find out. He sends what information he finds on Zemo and the man who had prosthetics to look like Barnes to Ross and saves a file for himself.

 

Once he finds out where Steve is he plans to work to get Steve, Barnes and the rest of the Avengers free from all charges against them. But Steve needs his help first.

 

After all Steve's friends are all in jail.

 

As much as Tony would like to also call them friends, he knows he doesn't deserve to.

 

\--------------

 

Clint antagonizes him and while Tony tries to give as good back, Clints comment about breaking backs has him scampering over to Sam's cell.

 

Tony takes a good look at Sam and wonders if he should apologize for shooting him, but Sam interrupts him by asking how Rhodey's doing.

 

Tony answers vaguely and with a few taps to his watch jams the audio and asks Sam his questions. Sam is reluctant at first until Tony says he's wrong and agrees to go to Steve as a friend.

 

It's painfully obvious by now that Tony can't go to him as a lover.

 

He wonders for a moment if Barnes has taken over that regard before he shoves that thought away.

 

He pauses before he leaves and crosses over to crouch by Wanda's cell. She's strapped in a straight jacket and feels his heart tug painfully at the sight. “I'll get you guys out of here I promise.” He tells her.

 

It isn't until he's moving away from her cell that she replies with a soft, clear: “Don't bother.”

 

\--------------

 

Everything goes to shit and now Tony knows he will never be able to fix things.

 

He's not sure if he wants to.

 

The sharp pain of betrayal chokes him and he staggers slightly away from Steve's pitying look.

 

“Tony,” Steve starts. “I'm sorry! I-” He's cut off as Tony slams his armored fist against his face and snaps his mask up.

 

Tony turns and launches himself at Barnes and the battle begins.

 

He's not really sure if he wants to kill Barnes, he knows in the back of his mind that Barnes was just a puppet. He's also not sure if he's only hurting Barnes for killing his mother or if he's hitting him for taking Steve away as well.

 

But punching him feels good and if Steve hadn't have stopped him he might have had another man's blood on his hands.

 

Steve stopped him by busting what used to be Tony's life support, not even a year and a half previously and Tony knows he will have nightmares about that his whole life. Of Steve killing him to save his Bucky.

 

But Barnes used to be a good man and Tony has never been one so a part of him can see why Steve chose to leave him in that bunker in the middle of Siberia.

 

\--------------

 

It's two months after Tony returned from Siberia that he receives Steve's letter and burn phone in the mail. He supposes the phone is ancient so that Tony won't be able to trace it if he were to call. Tony already knows that Steve's been staying in Wakanda with T'Challa he has no need to either call Steve nor turn in his location to Ross.

 

The letter is simple and Tony burns it as soon as he reads it and shoves the flip phone in a drawer and closes it.

 

He picks up the box, then frowns at the unexpected heft to it still. Tony peers into the box and sees another letter taped to a smaller brown envelope.

 

Tony pulls out the contents and reads the letter.

 

_Tony,_

_I'm sorry things couldn't work out between us._

_I never wanted things to end like this, please believe me when I say that._

_Keep this and give it to someone who truly deserves it._

_Sincerely, Steve_

 

Tony feel dread fill him as he opens the envelope and pours out what he'd given to Steve all those months ago.

 

He feels tears well up in his eyes but clamps down on it. He stands up, quickly stashes it in the desk with the burn phone, and leaves the room to head back to Rhodey.

 

Tony Stark has his heart returned to him twice in less than a year.

 

That's okay, it's not like he had much of one in the first place.

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Basically i remembered Tony gave Pepper that necklace with shrapnel pieces and asked my friend if Pepper ever have that back to Tony.
> 
> And then this was made!
> 
>  
> 
> Let me know what you think?


End file.
